The Belief That Stops You From Making (Big) Money
You keep yourself small. Don’t you?
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I’m lying in bed, exhausted, repeating my money mantras.
I am worth it. I am worth millions. I have something amazing to offer the world and deserve a massive payout.
I don’t remember when I fell asleep, but I’m jolted awake by a breakthrough so powerful I find it hard to take full breaths.
Hm. I guess these mantras work after all.
I’ve been ashamed of my business for 10 years.
I was ashamed of how much I charged.
I was ashamed of where I sold my services. A platform called Fiverr doesn’t communicate prestige.
I was ashamed that I’m a Bulgarian. I tried to lie about it in the beginning. Who’d hire a Bulgarian writer?
For a decade, as my business grew and allowed us to move cities, buy homes & cars, travel, eat, and send our kids to private pre-school, I was trying to leave it.
I was trying so hard that I designed, produced, and sold (7) notebooks.
I wrote the first drafts of two novels.
I wrote children’s books.
I’m now barely keeping myself from starting a relationship newsletter.
Not that there’s something bad in starting new things. It’s the reasoning that was off. My reason was I wanted to run away from my current business because it made me feel like I wasn’t good enough.
Then came the wake-up call. It wasn’t the business that caused my not-enoughness. It was my not-enoughness that was running my business.
You keep yourself small. Don’t you?
I’ve tried to start an e-mail list a couple of times. Then I’d quit. Then I’d be ashamed to start again because what would people think?
I talk about novels in one e-mail and copywriting in the next. Who would want to follow a person like that?
Who would pay a person like that? It’s best not to reach above my station. I’m a non-native writer who’s all over the place. Fiverr is the best I can do anyway.
